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you are the most fortunate mistake i've ever made. i wish on every falling star and whisper your name i keep telling myself, i'm not the desperate type Im sick of walking past all the people i used to know, and pretend that they were never even an important part of my life Wait long enough to always mean what you say Speak quick enough to always say what you think Think long enough to understand what you feel. Feel deep enough to do what you mean Never wait too long. Time will pass you by. Only those who attempt the absurd achieve the impossible. You say girls are confusing? Nice try. Girls are the easiest to understand. We want love. We want trust, we want everything most guys lack. We want someone to change for us; we want them to accept the fact that sometimes we forget to shave. We want someone who doesn`t put drugs & alcohol before us. We want back rubs; we want you to give us flowers. We want you to hold our hand; we want you to be able to have sex with us for the beauty, not just cause you want it. We all just want our own Prince Charming. But holding people away from you, & denying yourself love, that doesn`t make you strong. If anything it makes you weaker. Cause you`re doing it out of fear I can say I made a lot of mistakes, but I don`t regret things. Cause at least I didn`t spend a life standing outside, wondering what living would be like on the inside. it`s not those who are there when you need them. it`s who has been there the entire time I think that the only reason why people hold onto memories so tight, for so long is cause memories are the only things that don`t change when everything else does there comes a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix things. its not giving up, its realizing you dont need certain people. maybe the best thing to do is stop figuring our where youre going, & just enjoy where youre at. There are always sides. there is always a winner & a loser. for every person who gets, theres someone who must give. The more you get to know a person, the more attractive they become to you. Because everything beautiful you see on the inside of them, suddenly you're able to see on the outside of them too. Force a smile, blink away the tears. I'm supposed to be strong, to have no fears. But I'm finding it hard not to frown. I'm such a strong person. Why am I breaking down? Once in a lifetime, you find your reason for living.You find the one who makes your dreams come true.I could search forever and no one could ever compare to you she's got bite marks on her tongue from all the things she's never said You're the one I stay up all night thinking about, coming up with cute things that I wish would happen It takes more than a million people to complete the world, but it only takes you to complete me. When he's not around there's something missing in her smile. You will find a girl prettier than me, smarter than me, and funnier than me, but you will never find a girl just like me. I've always wanted to be with you. I was just afraid that you would get tired of me. I wasn't sure I could handle losing you. Then I realized that I would rather spend five minutes with you than a lifetime without you. And yet this pretty girl is still dedicated to a fairytale that has already ended. And I'm blasting my music so I won't hear my thoughts, but it's stupid because the lyrics remind me of what I'm trying to forget. he said he would stay on the phone, until i fell asleep. when i woke up, with the phone against my ear, i hear his voice, "hi. i had a conversation with all your dreams last night. and for the record, i love you too." It was cold. your hands were shaking, & I stepped in front of you just to wrap my arms around you as I said, "let's pretend winter isn't here." as you buried your head on my shoulder, you said, "let's pretend the snow isn't the only thing falling fast." I want to be the girl you hit a homerun for. The one you score a goal for. the one who makes you smile, makes you laugh, and makes your heart skip a beat. Okay? i just want to be that girl. i'm holding onto a dream that won't come true. i want you to want me, the way i want you. it`s kind of like he`s one of those songs that goes around & around in your head, & you just can`t get it out. we're not sarcastic ; we're hilarious. we're not sluts ; we just get any guy we want. we're not bitches ; we just don't like you. we aren't conceited ; we speak the truth. we're not obsessed ; we're just best friends. I want you to put out your hand and grab for mine while all your friends are watching, && say "c`mon, let`s make them jealous." remind me to never judge how well I know a person. because the one person I thought I know best. I don`t even know anymore. have you ever been in love ? horrible, isnt it ? it makes you so vulnerable. it opens your chest and& opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and& mess you up. you build up all these defenses. you build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person wanders into your stupid life .. you give them a piece of you. they dont ask for it. they do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, then your life isnt your own anymore. love takes hostages. it gets inside you. it eats you out and& leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like " maybe we should just be friends " or " how very perceptive " turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. it hurts. not just in the imagination. not just in the mind. its a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you and rips-you-apart. i hate love. i sleep with your hoodie on, even when its hotter than hell. just because it smells like you. and when you told me you loved me.. did you forget to say "just kidding " ? Shaking on the outside because of what I'm feeling on the inside. And even my best friend wants to beat me up, because i say your name too much. don't you just love how every girls profile is about a guy, but he doesn't understand that every single word of it is for him. please don't act like you care. you can't care. i know you don't. you've watched me destroy myself for too long now. &if you really cared, you would have tried to stop it by now. i'm tired of thinking of you. tired of thinking that getting you is possible. tired of having high hopes. and just, i'm tired of being let down. a good friend will sit on the side of the pool with you when it's "that time of the month", but a best friend will throw you a tampon and then push you in maybe it's selfish but even though i know we will never be together i couldn't stand to see you with anyone else. and darling, if he doesnt mean anything to you why do you still dream of him at night? so just because i finally got over you, doesn't mean there aren't days that it all comes rushing back. When people don't laugh at our jokes, I don't think of it as an "you had to be there" thing, more like an "you have to be mentally retarded like us" thing. And after a while, the jokes aren't funny anymore. theres nothing left to smile about. Everyone begins to look the same. lovers lose their passion, friends become enemies & the life we once knew..is gone. i wonder when i pass by does his stomach do a flip? does he get nervous? does he ignore his friends, just to look at me? does he wait to see my smile? does he get sweaty palms? does he think to himself "oh god here she comes"? what would I be without my friends? probably normal here i am sitting here reading quotes again with one person on my mind the whole entire time Goodbye, drama. Hello, I don't give a shit. You're starting to lose your biggest fan. The fantasy of him is wonderful. But the reality of him... Just isn't all that glamorous anymore. Frankly i'm ashamed that i left my name on his lips. Blow me off. Act like I don't matter. Don't worry; It's not the first time someone has hurt me. So use me up then throw me away So i'll fall asleep and try not to think twice about all these things. you said forever. She blows big bubbles with her gum and laughs when they pop all over her pretty face. She dances in her victoria secrets underwear. She takes crazy pictures and posts them on her myspace. To her friends, she's a star. Because she realized that life Is way too short to be crying over the stupid asshole that broke her heart. Letting go isn't to forget, Not think about, or ignore. It doesn't leave feelings of anger, Jealousy or regret. Letting go isn't winning, Nor is it losing. It's not about pride. It's not obsessing about or dwelling on the past. It isn't about loss, It's not about defeat. To let go is to cherish memories, But overcome them. Letting go is having the courage To accept change. The strength to keep moving. Letting go is growing up. As she sits in the corner, face to the floor, she dispells smoke from her lips and slowly floats away with it. letting go of so much pain her tears are thick enough to stain the pavement that slowly becomes her best friend when she needs to run away. She'll find out this is harder than taking medicine so lead her on..and tell her lies; it's no big deal she's just a girl.. right? "I do my thing and you do yours. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, then it is beautiful." the bad thing about a girl with a broken heart is that she starts to hand out the pieces to anyone who comes around. 50% of what people say when they are joking, is true i always keep bumping into you everywhere i go i find you. why ? maybe this could be fate's way of bringing us together or maybe fate's just rubbing in the fact that i cant have you. it's pathetic how much you used to mean to me. how much i adored you. how you were basically my entire fucking world. jealousy is a disease.. get well soon bitchezzzzz my theory is that maybe, if i keep my distance.. you`ll start to miss me i saw you today, then looked away but i couldnt resist to turn around & look back.. & you know what? you were looking at me too another poem, another line, another girl, pretending she`s fine. people hurt me, criticize me, tell me I'm wrong, lie to me, turn their backs on me, kill me slowly, and they wonder what the fuck my problem is? lights, camera, wait. no one's getting any action. Friends are like wedgies, they know your inner self, they're intimately close & it feels great when you pick out a good one! who do you want to be? the guy i tell my secrets to, or the guy my secrets are about? i guess that's what happens in the end you start thinking about the beginning.. Me? Bitchy? so sorry, I was never taught to say fuck you politely call me a bitch, well youre a whore. and id rather be known for what i do than who i do. comment if you use :)
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soooo, i am going on a longgg hiatus. school is starting. freshmann year :). i really wanna do good, so i am not going to be spending as much time on myspace. soo yeah please dont delete me, or block me. please
-kaela
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